Saturday was beautiful and sunny, the perfect day for a trail walk.
You'd think this was such a sweet, calm capture. Nope. She was ticked.
It was shortly after this that I made a declaration. Maybe it's not a good decision, maybe it is. But I made it anyway: I'm not bring the older kids on walks anymore. I need this time for me, a chance to rejuvenate if you will, and the complaining, fighting, and general stress that comes along with having them there is not worth it. It has the opposite effect of what I hope for every single time. And then what was supposed to be refreshing ends up sucking the very life out of me. I wish it weren't this way. well, that's a whole other post...
Sunday poured and poured all day long. Monday we decided to hit the road for something fun and somehow ended up at this joint. I explain a little below...guess I wrote that part first, ha ha.
So then Screechy McScreech started in. Bill walked around with him while we were waiting for our lunch. Fifteen minutes later, still waiting, I just scooped him up and brought him outside.
Yeah, it looks all nice and serene. But the smell of manure was so thick in the air I nearly gagged. You could smell it from inside the restaurant, too. Which, by the way, was the most ridiculously overpriced place I've seen in a long, long time. I guess you can get away with that when you are literally in the middle of nowhere, and Google maps lead you astray with promises of waterfalls, so by the time you find this joint, you're relieved...until you walk inside, sit down and scan the menu.
Anyhoo. If I sound bitter, it's because, well, I guess I still am. A little.
There was a dairy barn at the end of this field, and another one across the street. I was so angry at this point. The waterfall we'd planned to go to couldn't be found (later Bill mentioned that one site said you couldn't access it because it "technically" is on private property. Well that might have been good to know from the start. Maybe? Yes. I think yes.)
We finished our sub-par sandwiches and hit the road again, still unsure of where we wanted to go at this point. My pity party game was still going strong, and while we were kind of near a mountain, I felt so out of sorts and tired I just didn't think I could do it. Lame, I know. I kept my comments to myself and just went along with it.
Wouldn't you know it was the very thing that changed everything around.
I was a sweaty mess by the time we reached the top, but it was fun! And everyone enjoyed being outside and working hard at the goal of getting to the top.
Someone looks a bit unsure of this whole packpacking thing.
Oh, but Daddy bending over to tie a shoe brings out all the smiles! ha ha ha
If you know me in real life, you know what this does to me.
Monkey see, monkey do ;)
Sweaty, frizzy mess here!
Maybe this pic is at such a weird angle because my arm was too tired to raise it right? ha ha
There were lots of other areas to walk around and see all the vistas, but I was holding Levi, who was pretty much done, done, and done at this point, so this is what I got. It really is beautiful anywhere you look.
This is Pack Monadnock by the way, so if you're in southern NH, you should visit!
We all made it in one piece!
I really missed Ethan. I know he isn't around as much between working, school, and his social life, and while I understand, it still stings. Things will never be the same, and I know that. It's just hard to accept at times.
We had told them we'd find a nearby Dunkin' for a little reward, and the boys came out of the store laughing their heads off. Apparently, the kid behind the counter gave Bill the senior discount. ha ha ha Hiking a mountain will do that to you. :)
Only later did I learn that he was being nice because Bill was a few cents short and didn't want to use a credit card. Twenty bucks won't get you very far when there are this many of you, plus that dumb lunch, but I didn't even care because it turned out to be such a fun day.
And THEN Bill took Jonah out to run some errands after he'd kissed Levi goodnight and I was feeding and rocking him, and when I came downstairs, Bill was holding the most beautiful bouquet and smiling. Ethan works with a woman who arranges flowers at the shop, and the two of them had been in cohorts all week long. The flowers were so, so pretty, but the idea that they had spent time picking them out and having them be made ahead of time just for me made me feel really special.
Bill was taking the next day off so we could spend it together, the day before our anniversary, and he wanted to be around to see me enjoy my flowers. :)
This post already feels too long, so I'll end here. Besides, the truth is, nearly every single plan we made to celebrate our anniversary fell through for one reason or another. And that's okay. That's just how life goes sometimes. But that doesn't mean we shouldn't try again. I think many times we've felt crushed that something didn't happen, but then as time goes on, we never made it right. And then that disappointment took root and it became a bitter or sad regret. I won't ever regret putting our family's needs ahead of my own, and it just so happened that they needed All.The.Things over the past week or so, but we've committed to keep pursing those special dates that we had to put on hold, and now we have lots of things to look forward to.
Oops, it's later than I thought and hungry kids will be storming through any moment. Have a good day!
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