I've been trying without success for several minutes now to upload some pictures onto Picasa, but...nada. I don't know why, but boy oh boy does that make my blood boil! I'm trying to do something important here and the powers that be- mainly technology in general- have thrown a wrench in the works. (Yes, I am poking fun at myself here.)
Sigh. Deep breath. Life goes on.
I think I may be a teensy bit frustrated and flustered because my schedule has changed this week (and keeps changing) and with two birthdays, school parties, teacher gifts, plus a long, sad soap opera of a story with my minivan, dealing with some personal issues, and life in general, I feel like I'm sinking. And it's only 6:20 AM!
I want this time of year to be filled with peace and joy and wonderment and gratitude for all that I have, all that I have been blessed with. But I'm finding that easier said than done. I'm just plain sad. I know I've chosen not to share very personal details about my family life, so there's really a mountain of things the world at large knows nothing about, and it seems to be leaving deep, messy scars all over me. I find myself often wishing that I didn't have to go through this, that this can't possibly be my life story. I feel desperate to trade mine in for another, any other. But God is in control, and while I don't even pretend to understand the reasons for these trials, I do know that none of my hurt will be wasted. Normally that helps me, but today...today I'm just plain sad.